Thank you Lord for the nth time.
Let me tell what's been going on with us lately:
Before lei left she said we'll see to it that we'll be together after 85 days. We were very hopeful only to find out it aint that easy. One is, we have to raise around 200K in order to do that and by the cost of living and income here in the Philippines it maybe is impossible (yep am showing you that i am still optimistic even though there's a slight truth of "how can i raise that kind of amount in less than 3 months? i can but i'd be working my ass off day and night without eating and sleeping). So I turned to sidelines. After she left, i sent messages to friends if they have sidelines for the poor kid from makati and lei started hurling out application came monday (she arrived there friday). So we thought we have started rolling the ball.
But it ain't easy man.
After 3 weeks. I still didn't have sidelines and she didn't have any work.
Aside from no work the pangs of a long distance relationship has punches everyday. From the moment I find myself waking up to a minus-lei-day, to insecurities, to confusion, to what is she doing right now why can't she text, and vice versa of that. I don't know if i am made for a long distance relationship but one thing i'm sure of is, i get uneasy whenever i don't know what's happening to her. But I shouldn't be like that right? Sometimes I feel like an ass policing her every move. I don't like it and i was never like it to anybody. The desperation along with severe longing is unbearable. It was heart crushing because the thrill of after-85-days is dying by the everyday that is counted. See our blog here. But we didn't lose hope. We turn to God every sleeping and waking for guidance and grace. We accepted that God's ways are higher than ours and if He wills to let us experience the feeling of hopelessness and discouragement, let His will be done. But we didn't want to see it that way. Rather the experience taught us to hold on more to faith, to believing what is impossible because there is Him, to realize how God humbles hearts, to take pride in Him rather in our own strengths, to seek him all the time. I tell you whoever you are, i never prayed this much in my whole life.
Thank you Lord for the nth time.
Just today Lei received a call that she will start a job this coming march 19 thereby slimming the hope being with her in 85 days. But hey, i am not pessimistic that we seem to can't get it in 85 days. In fact i am thankful and very very glad. *backflips* The hope that we've been asking for beamed a light to what we are looking forward to.
Thank you Lord for the nth time.
And thank you to those who have extended prayers on our behalf. I've been looking back to past entries under this label and man... we are still going a long way. She said we'll make a new blog when i get there. I am very much excited to see here again.
Thank you Lord for the nth time.
sorry blogger guys. i'm keeping my thoughts because somebody has me for a blog for eternity. so let me just drift until i'll discard this one and...why am i explaining?
*dives in a pail*
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